Boo hiss!

It’s that time of year when I have to do my accounts. If I’m brutally honest, it was that time of year about three months ago, but preparing my accounts is a job so devoid of laughs that I tend to find myself pushing it further and further down my to do list… well if I wrote a to do list, I promise you it would be there, near the bottom.

How many coffees can I take before I can no longer focus on my receipts?

It’s not that my accounts are especially complicated. Just getting my receipts into order, entering them in a spreadsheet and handing everything over to my accountant. Even he doesn’t think I need to trouble a bookkeeper. Once I get into it, the whole process is pretty quick, it’s just the thought of doing it fills me with dread and I push it on down my (imaginary) to do list.

If you’ve ever seen Black Books, you’ll understand the kind of sentiment I’m expressing here. I’d rather sort my sock drawer than do my accounts.

There was a time when there was at least some entertainment value in the task. When I worked for News of the World it used to tickle my accountant’s imagination when I claimed for things like underwear from Victoria’s Secret (sometimes a necessary purchase when photographing a young lady for a kiss-and-tell story – oh yes, I covered all the important world events). But I haven’t had the opportunity to buy anything vaguely dodgy or fun for a long time, which takes away what little fun there was in this task.

Even writing this blog article is a distraction technique because I was doing my accounts this morning, I just needed a break. And so, after successfully completing one month’s receipts analysis, I treated myself with a coffee break. After another month I felt it was time for lunch. Another month completed after lunch and coffee beckoned again. Then I realised I needed to write a blog for today and nothing was jumping into my head, and yet writing a blog seemed like an excellent way of not doing my accounts.

Only problem is I’m running out of things to say about not doing my accounts and you probably stopped reading about three paragraphs ago. Dammit… back to the accounts… lalalalalalalala…